Mormon Momma

Caleb (6): Mom, when you fast you don’t eat breakfast or lunch?
Mom: Yup.
[pause]
Caleb: Mom, why would you ever want to fast?

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[Discussion with Caleb at the theater last night — having difficulty keeping his hands to himself.]
Mom: Caleb, please don’t touch other people. Don’t touch their hats or their clothes or their chairs or their skin. Keep your hands in your own space.
Caleb (6): What about their scabs?

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Caleb (5): Mom, can people bite your eye?

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Caleb (5): Mom, I need to know what happens when people tear their lips off.

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Mom: Belinda, will you come do your dishes?
Belinda (19): Can’t we just have a Jeeves?

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[While planning her 16th, night-games-at-the-park birthday party.]
Alana (16): Can’t we just have it at that park right over there?
Mom: Yea.
Alana: It’s perfect. Because it’s beautiful. It’s close by. And it’s right across the street from the temple so everyone will remain worthy!

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Alana (15): Mom, is our family thick as thieves?

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Samuel (49): Well, honey, that’s why you married me. Because I’m so good at narration.

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Backstory: We have a rule in our home. It states that if you come to the table and complain about the meal that someone else prepared for your edification, you are cordially invited to go complain in your room while the others eat the yucky food.
For April Fool’s Day today, Monica and I made a […]

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Alana (15): Mom, when my life flashes before my eyes, I want it to be in a musical montage.

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